Switching

Yes, I know I have always considered myself a bottom. For five years I have explored every avenue of my bottom side and would have been very happy to just continue that had not thoughts of topping entered my mind. I don't remember when this happened. I tried it when I first started bottoming, giving a switch friend of mine (or at least making the attempt) a birthday spanking. I did it only because he asked me to and I found out this is the worst reason to spank someone; as a personal favor/gift. I'm afraid my heart wasn't in it and I couldn't quite pull off the Domme role. In fact, I couldn't even pinken his bottom. And, believe me, I tried. But I spent the whole time just wanting to be over his knee and so I'm afraid I daydreamed through much of it. I know it was a disappointment to him but I warned him ahead of time, "I'm no Top." And I know he didn't appreciate that I just went through the motions of spanking him. I made an awful botch of it simply because that wasn't where I was at in my journey through the spanking universe. I wanted to explore this thing from the bottom because it was all so new to me. Well, long story short, it's not so new to me anymore.
So enter those Toppy type thoughts. I won't call them fantasies because I didn't really fantasize about it. I just kept having feelings like "I wonder what it would be like to top someone now; after experiencing the bottom for five years, I bet I could make a decent Top."
I believe none of us is all one thing or the other. We aren't all submissive or all dominant. It takes a little of both of those things to make it in the real world. So it came as really no surprise to me that I wouldn't turn out to be all bottom; that I could top, too and enjoy it much more than that experiment in terror years ago.
As a party was coming up, I went about deciding who I should trust this delicate information to. After all, after years of being "Cigi, the brat who can take it all", I was suddenly going to become "Miss Cigi...spanker of young men and ladies." In other words, I wanted to be both those things. I wanted someone who would be discreet about it and who had knowledge of topping and bottoming so I looked for the best switch I could find and, if I may say so, it was the perfect choice. Not only is this particular man a complete pain slut, he's also a consummate show-off and a wonderful teacher for "this thing we do". He let me use every toy I had and tutored me in how to use them correctly and safely. I all ready had the desire and the basic know-how just from being a bottom. But a lot of toys (particularly canes) take a lot of practice. After spanking him three times during the weekend, he told me, "You will make a very respected Top some day." I know he appreciated that I had asked him if he would be the first person to allow me to Top them. I ended up topping about five people that weekend including two women, who really enjoyed it. So I have to say that, although I am no longer 100% bottom, I have not become 100% top. I still prefer to bottom but I have so many lovely toys, how could I not share them with other spankos?
I know how nice a spanking is supposed to feel. I know most bottoms (at least this one) would like to be spanked by a non-threatening, "this is just for fun" type person. I know at a party, that is the prevailing attitude. That 's the type of spanker I want to be. I want people to say, "She's fun no matter which side of the lap she's on." A Top/Dom friend of mine once told me, "Switches are like bisexuals...they just don't know what they want." I tend to think that switches get 50% more opportunity to have fun than just tops or bottoms.
So if you see me at a party and you want to ask me to play, even though my name tag says I am a bottom, it's ok to ask me if I will switch with you. It goes along with that 50% more fun thing.
So I haven't stopped bottoming, have no fear, I just went down another avenue on the road of my spanking journey.

Play nice...and play safe...
That's all for now, Kiddies!