Just Say No...To Toys

I had a lot of fun at the recent Crimson Moon party, but during the course of the festivities a serious issue arose. How do you politely tell someone you don't want a certain toy used on you? At parties, I don't like to have too much wood used on me because wood isn't nearly as forgiving as leather. Wood can flat-out toast you in no time at all. Well, when I was busy waving my hand in the air agreeing to this game of Musical Chairs, I knew all the toys we would get spanked with were wood. I had no problem with that, because as the "winner" I only got two with everything. But when I was playing with another gentleman and I explained to him that I don't do wood at parties, he immediately came back with, "You took 15 strokes with that cane." How do you explain to someone (again politely) that you like the cane...wood paddles are just ok and then only in small doses? Plus by the time I'd taken 15 cane strokes my bottom was pretty well bruised and not in any shape for anything more than hand spanking. I thought this Top was kind of selfish. When a bottom declares a certain toy or a certain whole category of toys (like wood) off limits, that should be the end of it, don't you think? I couldn't believe this guy sounded a bit miffed when I told him, "Sorry, no wood." He agreed, of course, but I heard the disappointment in his voice. What's the big deal? Why should it matter what I want used and what I don't want used? It's my bottom, I get first and last say about what gets used on it. And, as I often explain to Tops, I only have one bottom and it has to last me the weekend. Do you think I have a spare hanging in the closet? Let me just slap that baby on and party on. Sorry, it doesn't work that way. I believe most Tops are courteous when it comes to saving some bottom for others and realizing that we still want to play after we play with them. But I have met Tops who didn't care which night of the party it was or who else I wanted to play with. Those are the Tops I call selfish.
But back to my original question: how do you let someone know, politely but emphatically, that they will not be using that toy or whatever on you? I have found that with some of them you have to throw polite, courteous and ladylike out the window. They will try to slip that toy in behind your back and then claim they didnt use it. Or they will try to just go against your wishes and use that wood anyway. Or if you say, "I am only up for hand spanking right now" and they try to talk you into "just a few with this strap" or "just a couple taps with this paddle". What do you say then? Well, since I have been known to be a bit of a big mouth, I have no problem asking, "What part of 'no wood' are you having a hard time understanding?" At the newbie orientation (which everyone attending their first Crimson Moon party must attend, even if they have been going to other's parties and spanking for years) I'm sure this issue is addressed when discussing "NO means NO". Are some people just not listening? Or do they listen but they figure the rules don't count for them? Or do they just not care? Like I often tell these guys, "Don't get into the habit of being someone who doesn't listen or seems like they don't care. We girls talk at parties and if word gets around that you aren't safe, your chances to play will very quickly dry up." And believe me, I talk at parties...and talk, and talk, and talk. It might sound like a small issue to some people and they might think "a few taps with that paddle can't hurt". But think about it. If you said "no" to something and then someone was able to sweet talk you into it anyway, what's next? Bottoms have to say "no" and then mean it. The rule says "No means no", not "no means no unless you can talk them into it". I want to make it clear right here that this particular Top gave me no problems when I said "no" to his offer of wood paddles. But I distinctly heard disappointment or maybe even anger in his voice. Of course, the Top should get enjoyment out of a session. But it's my bottom being spanked and if I don't want wood paddles used on it, that is that. And I shouldn't have to give him a college term paper length explanation about it, either.
Maybe there is something about me that brings out the "competitor" in some Tops. But that is their problem. The same as it's their problem when they tell me "you shouldn't wear those type of panties...I don't like them" or "you should wear a skirt instead of those jeans". Get over it! And get over yourself while you're at it. I don't dress for you...I dress for me. No one tells me how to dress or what to wear. Most of the people who spank me are quite happy to play with me, no matter what kind of panties I'm wearing or whether I'm wearing a dress or a pair of jeans.
So I guess what I'm trying to say is if you're a bottom and you don't want a certain toy used on you, you do have the right to speak up an say "NO!" And if you're a Top who gets told "no" to a certain toy, that is the end of the discussion as far as I'm concerned.
I guess I probably blew that little scenario way, way out of proportion. But it does happen enough times that I wanted to vent about it.

Thanks and have a great evening!